"Why do I have to have moral issues with killing someone? I feel like such a hypite! It's worse than a vegetarian touting organically-grown steaks."
--Eric, physics teacher, involuntary vampire, and part-time demon-slayer.

Eric didn't ask to be a vampire. In fact, he didn't even believe in them. Biting your own tongue with your fangs does a lot of convincing. Even so, being a part-time undead isn't as easy as you might think. It can let you hold down a day job, true, but sometimes the night "life" can be more than a little difficult, what with those bloodthirsty urges and predatory instincts kicking in. Luckily for Eric, he can rely on his trusty steed and her unwavering support, his flaming sword and its sarcastic wit, and his own snarky sense of humor.

"The only thing I could think was 'This is so gonna suck when I hit that mess of Things.' What I actually said was more along the lines of, 'Oh, sssshhhhhhhiiiiiiii--'"
--Eric, reluctant king, expectant father, and short-term astronaut.